365 Days

Last week T helped out at his high school's graduation ceremony, and when he got home he happily announced, "only 365 days until I graduate".

I'm pretty sure I had a small heart attack.  All I heard was "you've only got 365 days left of being my mom".

I know, I know, I'm absolutely ridiculous.  No matter how old my boys get, I will always be their mom.  But in 365 days, when the youngest son graduates from high school, and the older one graduates from college, the life of mom as I've known it will change forever.

I've been a stay at home mama since C was born.  I had planned to go back to work when he was five months old, but as the day got closer, I knew I couldn't do it.  I was fortunate enough to be financially able to make that decision, with a supportive husband who just wanted me to be happy.

Let's ignore the bad hair and swollen face.  My body did not do pregnancy well.

And happy I have been.  Over the last 20 years I've changed diapers, fed babies, handled temper tantrums, done more laundry than I care to remember, nursed boo-boos and illnesses, helped with homework, been the family chauffeur, attended countless sporting events and concerts and assemblies, and been a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen.  

I wouldn't change one single minute.

If I had my way, we'd go on like this forever.  I love my job, and I'm not interested in retiring.  It's hard to remember what my life was like before these two arrived.  I vaguely recall being skinnier, well rested, and not so anxious. But like billions of moms before me, it will soon be time to move on and find a new normal.

However, I've still got 365 days.  Here's what I plan to do with them...

Go to every sporting event during T's senior year.  That's a lot of running and swimming meets.  There's talk of the cross country team attending an invitational in Hawaii this fall - hmmm...wonder if they need chaperones?

Be there any time they want to talk.  Teenage boys are odd creatures - they'll hardly say a word for days, and then everything comes pouring out at 10pm on a school night.  No matter what I'm doing, I will stop and listen.

More family dinners.  More fun stuff on the weekends.  At least one more big vacation.

I will enjoy the little things, like socks being left in the kitchen, an empty milk jug still in the refrigerator, and noisy boys on Friday night playing video games and having pizza when all I want is some peace and quiet.  Those things drive me crazy now, but I will miss them when they're gone.

Hug them and tell them I love them every. single. day.  This will undoubtedly drive them crazy, but it's the price you pay to grow up so darn fast.

Next year the boys will be moving on, and it will be quiet around here with just my husband and me.  I'll still be making dinner and picking up his dirty socks, and life will be good. Different, but good.  I can't even imagine what the new path will look like, but we'll figure it out.

But I've still got 365 days.