Helping Teens Find A Mentor

A few months ago I wrote about things your teen can do this summer, which included finding someone to "job shadow".  One of the comments on that post got me thinking about mentors, and how we often don't take advantage of that relationship in this modern, busy world.  Finding an adult with the experience or knowledge your teen seeks can be invaluable in their path to a career.  

My younger son T hopes to be a veterinarian, and he was very fortunate this summer to work at my sister's clinic with their new vet.  Dr. A allowed him to come in twice a week and follow him as he saw patients and conducted surgeries.

On the first day of work, T came home full of interesting stories and new experiences. Over lunch, Dr. A told him why he had agreed to the mentorship.  When he was T's age, he had a doctor do the same for him, and he wanted to show his appreciation by passing on the favor.  He explained to T that everyone who wants to go to vet school has excellent grades and lots of activities on their resume. T needs to do something to stand out.  By working with Dr. A (and hopefully doing a good job), he will be able to get letters of recommendation from him for scholarships and applications.  

Plus, Dr. A knows the ins and outs of vet school, and has already started giving T great advice on what classes to take now, and what undergraduate degree would be most helpful once he gets to college.  This summer experience has already given T a leg up in his future career.  He was very lucky that his aunt was able to connect him with Dr. A.

T hasn't met an animal he didn't like!

How can your teen find a mentor?  It may seem difficult, but influential people in any given field are often happy to advise the next generation, love to impart their knowledge, and would enjoy helping if asked.  

The best place to start is by talking to family and friends.  Often times they have useful contacts you didn't know they had!  Plus, these are the people that can vouch for your teen and get them an introduction.  

Having your child ask their school career counselor can also be helpful.  Even if they don't have a direct contact in their industry, they might be able to point them in the right direction. Look for networking opportunities such as business association or chamber of commerce meetings.  

As I've written about before, my older son C found his mentor a few years ago by calling the local Ferrari dealership and speaking with the person whose job he someday hopes to have. It's okay for your teen to make direct contact with someone in their chosen field by phone or email, and explain what they are looking for.

And C has never met a Ferrari that he didn't like!

Once they've found someone suitable, have them set up a meeting with the potential mentor.  Your teen should have a clear idea of what they're hoping the mentor can do for them - allow them to job shadow, or give advice on a good education path.  Don't expect the mentor to figure out what they need - have an outline and then listen to their opinion.

Have your teen ask the mentor about the various pathways to success in their chosen field, and what activities or training would make them the most desirable candidate for the job. Ask the mentor what they wish they had known when they first started out, or what they would have done differently.  

Once they've had the initial meeting, have your child stay in touch.  C talks to his mentor about once a month either on the phone or through email, letting him know how things are going and tweaking his path.  Try not to overwhelm the mentor though - they are busy people.  Remind your teen to always remain professional.  Finally, don't forget to thank the mentor every once in a while - they will appreciate it!  Building a mentor/mentee relationship has to be based on a foundation of mutual trust, and it may take a few tries to find the right person.

Hopefully C and T are on the path to success in their chosen field, with help from their mentors.  Now if I can just figure out how we're paying for that path...